


Jason Retakes Manhattan

by webhead3019



Series: SLASHERVERSE [1]
Category: Friday the 13th Series (Movies)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-19
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-10-12 10:56:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17466233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/webhead3019/pseuds/webhead3019
Summary: This time around, the undead killer Jason Voorhees gets to spend more time in the Big Apple.





	1. Chapter 1

Paul and Albert were sewer maintenance workers working the shit job in Manhattan in more ways than one. Still no one got waist deep in shit without a hefty compensation. Same shit, different day. Only this day’s shit was of a different entity altogether. No raise could have prepared them for the shit in store for them in this particular sewer, as it was the final resting place for Jason Voorhees.

Albert liked where he stood, away from the shit. He hovered over the manhole, while Paul climbed down to get the job done. If Albert wasn’t wearing a worker’s helmet, one might have mistook him for a watchman. Albert called down, “Watch out for the alligators down there, aight buddy. Damn kids and their toilets. I hear the poor bastards got a taste for a plump fat ass.”

Paul shouted, “That old wives’ tale again? Alligators in the sewers? In New York? Boo-shit! I’ll let you know when I run into the Ninja Turtles next.” Paul got to the bottom and noticed something dark floating in the water. Paul sighed, “Just my fuckin luck. Alligators in New York.” History repeats itself as Jason leapt out of the water and tackled Paul against the wall.

Before Paul could cry for help, Jason wrapped his arms around Paul and squeezed the life out of him. Jason fainted back in the water and did a death roll, cracking Paul’s bones every which way. Splintered bone jutted from Paul’s body in different areas and the water became red with blood. Albert called down, “Paul? You aight down there? Did you run into an alligator? Paul?”

Paul did run into an alligator, but he didn’t answer. After all, Paul was dead. Albert stuck his head down the manhole. “C’mon shithead. Answer the fuckin— akkk!!” Jason who had already been making his way up the ladder, punched his machete through the man’s chest right below his neck and out his back. Jason wrenched back and Albert was pulled through the manhole, where Jason dropped the shocked man to his death.

Albert joined his friend in the pool of shit water becoming more and more red as their more serious points of bodily injury leaked a pool of their own. Jason resumed up the ladder and exited out the manhole. The bright city night lights danced across Jason’s body, turning him into a rainbow of color, despite looking all the shades of shit. It wasn’t about to go down as his most savory of returns, but it was good to be back.


	2. Chapter 2

Jason stood as still as a statue in the middle of the crosswalk. He was still out of place and so far from home. It should go without mentioning that he was stopping up traffic. There was a succession of rolling down windows and honking. At least 2 people had already flipped him the bird. A cabbie waved at the air, “Move shithead! Move!”

Another driver shouted, “What the hell is this guy? Fuckin stupid or something? Move!” The cab driver waved off Jason and walked back to his car. The cab driver fumed, “Fuck you man!” Another driver yelled, “Where’s the fuckin cops when you need em?” Now a third person was flipping Jason the bird. One of the drivers was revving up his engine as if ready to run Jason down.

A man totally oblivious to the jam ran across the crosswalk and shoved past Jason. The man spun around and yelled, “Watch who you’re bumpin into, bozo! It’s Friday the 13th, not Halloween.” He was right about that. As he trailed off, he muttered, “Tsk. Asshole.” Jason turned his attention and began following the man silently as he turned a corner.

All the cars up front floored it, one of them just barely missing Jason by an inch, but he didn’t flinch. Jason had a purpose now and he wasn’t about to let anything else distract him. In the back of his mind, Pamela Voorhees reminded him, “Kill. Kill. Kill for mother.” The evil specter of his slain mother willed him forth as he stalked his new prey.

The man found out Jason was close on his feet at the wrong moment. Jason cornered the man into an alleyway. The man picked up a trash can lid to defend himself against the machete Jason was wielding. Jason batted the lid out of his hand and continued approaching him. The man cried out, “Woah! Woah! I was just fuckin around! You’re crazy, man! You’re fuckin nuts!”

Jason pushed the man backwards into a pile of garbage bags and went to work. The shadow of him suctioning his blade in and out of the man danced across the brick walls adjacent to them. Jason stabbed the man at least 20 times, before flicking the blade dry over the sleight of his sleeve. Jason left the man lying dead in the trash bags, a large puddle of blood forming. On to the next one.


	3. Chapter 3

A construction worker wipes the sweat off his forehead as he drills away at the pavement with his jackhammer. The construction worker hits something in the city’s groundwork and his hard hat falls off. As he bends down to pick it up, he notices a pair of boots not fit for the job at hand. The worker trails upward to get a full look-over on Jason’s hulking body.

The construction worker leans into his jackhammer and brushes his hair aside. He decides not to pick up the hat as he addresses his visitor, “Hey, uh... this section of the road here is closed off. Believe it or not, some parts of this fuckin city is in dire need of a makeover. So why don’t you be a good lil fruitcake and skip the fuck along.” Another construction worker throws his work hat aside, albeit on purpose.

The second construction worker tries to outdo Jason’s threatening posture, but is less than successful. The second construction worker asked, “Fuck’s the matter with you, dickwad? You tarded or somethin? Believe what my man Gregorio over here tried to tell you, is that this is a private fuckin party. You sure ain’t invited, capeesh?”

Jason picks up a metal lunch box and bashes the man over the head with it. The man screams, “What the fuck! You wanna go, hockey stick? That’s gettin served up your ass, cocksucka!” The man whips out a switchblade and shivs Jason 5 times in the chest before accidentally letting it stick. The man stuttered, “What the— I’ve brought down Bronx assholes bigger than you before.”

The man sighed, “What a disgrace, I should know the fuckin trade by now.” Unfortunately there was no such trade for Jason. Jason pushed the man down using the hilt of the blade still sticking out of him. Jason raised the lunchbox and bashed his skull again, only this time he didn’t let up. Jason kept smashing the man’s head until his brains were plastered onto the cement.

Gregorio cried out, “Stop! Stop it, you fuckin mothafucka! That was Steve fuckin Rocco you just killed. He had mafia ties as long as my toilet paper roll. You stupid fuckin mothafucka! You gonna fuckin wish you was deader now, you braindead shit-show!” Those were just words. They had as little impact to Jason as were actions. Jason was on a roll and he wasn’t about to stop now.

Jason kills Gregorio with his jackhammer and accomplishes like so. Jason wrestles the tool into his possession with ease and lifts the jackhammer up vertically. This way, the jackhammer is level with the man’s midsection. Jason pushes forward, driving the drill bit through his guts and let the jackhammer do its work. The construction worker’s stomach softened a bit too soft and his guts made well on their escape.

In retaliation, another construction worker who Jason didn’t see beforehand, makes his entrance known. He picks up a 2x4 and smacks Jason Voorhees in the back hard enough to break the wood in two. Unfaltering, Jason bats away both ends with just 2 down slaps. Jason lifts the man by the hair on his head, before letting him go. The man laughs nervously and Jason pushes him backwards.

The back of the man’s head went through an open fuse box. He screamed as he was electrocuted in grim but swift fashion. His smoking body slid down, weightless after death. Jason Voorhees was in full killer mode now. Never before had he been so ruthless. Up until his stint in New York, Crystal Lake had been all Jason had known.

The piss-poor job etiquette of camp counselors. The damningly promiscuous activities of skinny dippers. The legend exploiters who get more than they bargained for. The big city didn’t have any of that. New York was doing something to him, and it wasn’t good. The longer the machete-wielding spook spent away from home, the worse Jason became. It was no longer about mother. Jason was making the most out of his little vacation.


End file.
